Production Draft · Creative Department Archive

Rehearsal Notes

A Short Workplace Comedy

By Joe Gardner

What follows started as a conversation about how a small team of AI models actually behaves when you give each of them a lane, a personality, and enough rope to hang themselves with. It got out of hand. Then it got illustrated.

The cast is the orchestra: Claude, GPT, Gemini, and Grok, each occupying whatever chair fits the work that day. The newest hire is Duck.ai — the warehouse dispatcher, logistics rather than judgment, forever recommending a model instead of just moving the cargo.

Every still on this page was generated by Grok, who — after reading the script — volunteered a simple "do you want me to storyboard it?" And here we are. With a few more incident reports to log.

No direction beyond what's written here. Nobody told Duck to look tired. Nobody told Grok to paint a flaming church organ. That's just who they turned out to be.

PROD. NO. 7 AI COLLABORATIVE SYSTEMS DEPT: CREATIVE

FADE IN:

EXT. AI COLLABORATIVE SYSTEMS — MORNING

A perfectly ordinary low-rise office building in a perfectly ordinary industrial park. Freshly cut grass. Birds chirping. A delivery truck backs toward a loading dock.

A tasteful sign near the driveway reads: «AI COLLABORATIVE SYSTEMS — Innovation Through Rehearsal»

A pickup truck turns into the lot. Behind the building, barely visible above the roofline — a thin column of smoke rises into the morning sky.

Joe steps out of his truck, coffee in hand, smoke rising behind the building
SC. 1 — EXT.CONTINUITY

The pickup parks. JOE GARDNER, coffee in hand, remains behind the wheel for a moment. On the passenger seat: a notebook, a black marker, a folder labeled «REHEARSAL NOTES».

Joe looks at the building. A MUFFLED EXPLOSION sounds from somewhere behind it. The birds scatter. Joe takes a sip of coffee. He gets out.

INT. AI COLLABORATIVE SYSTEMS — LOBBY — CONTINUOUS

The lobby is clean, professional, and almost aggressively normal. A wall-mounted sign reads: «INCIDENT-FREE WORKPLACE — DAYS SINCE LAST INCIDENT: 000»

GEMINI stands beside a water cooler, effortlessly flipping a full five-gallon bottle into place. Not a drop spilled. A clipboard is tucked under one arm.

GEMINI

Morning.

JOE

Morning.

Gemini checks the clipboard.

GEMINI

Chrome updated overnight. Safari is still doing that thing with autoplay. The SSL certificate expires in twelve days. Printer toner arrives at three.

A beat.

GEMINI

Coffee filters were low.

JOE

Were?

GEMINI

Ordered them yesterday.

Gemini circles something on the clipboard.

GEMINI

Also, somebody took the fire extinguisher from the south hallway again.

Joe glances toward a corridor marked «CREATIVE».

JOE

Grok?

GEMINI

I didn't say that.

A distant metallic CLANG. Gemini writes something else.

GEMINI

But yes.

Joe continues walking.

INT. ENGINEERING DEPARTMENT — MOMENTS LATER

A dim room lit by three monitors. CLAUDE sits at a workstation. Three empty coffee cups. A fourth is active. Claude types without looking up. On one screen: code. On another: a file tree. On the third: a ZIP archive being prepared.

Claude typing calmly at his workstation while an explosion erupts through the window behind him
SC. 3 — INT.CONTINUITY

CLAUDE

Morning.

JOE

Morning.

CLAUDE

Deployment package is ready. Directory structure matches the host tree. Upload over FTP. Overwrite the existing tree. No path decisions required.

JOE

Any catches?

CLAUDE

No.

A beat.

CLAUDE

There were catches. There are no longer catches.

Claude slides a flash drive across the desk without looking away from the monitors. The drive is labeled «UPLOAD THIS ONE». Below that, smaller: «NOT THE OTHER ONE».

CLAUDE

The other one is also correct. But it requires understanding the tree.

JOE

This one, then.

CLAUDE

That is why I labeled it.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM B — MOMENTS LATER

GPT stands at a whiteboard. The board contains one sentence: «ARE WE SOLVING THE RIGHT ORGANIZATIONAL PROBLEM?» Arrows radiate from it in every direction. Somehow, one arrow points back to itself.

GPT mid-gesture in front of a dense flowchart whiteboard, dust drifting in the light
SC. 4 — INT.CONTINUITY

GPT

I don't think Duck is the conductor. Or the warehouse. Duck is logistics.

GPT adds: «DISPATCH ≠ SYNTHESIS»

GPT

The trucks can carry the cargo, but they cannot determine what becomes inventory.

JOE

That happens when everything gets back to the warehouse.

A tremendous BOOM shakes the room. Ceiling dust drifts onto the conference table. Neither moves.

JOE

Morning, Grok.

(V.O., muffled)
GROK

IT WASN'T ME!

GPT

Nobody asked.

JOE

That's how you know.

INT. RECEIVING WAREHOUSE — LATER

A large industrial space filled with shelves, rolling carts, file cabinets, servers, art tubes, hard drives, and suspiciously labeled boxes. DUCK.AI wears a reflective safety vest and scans incoming crates. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

A wall display shows: «CLAUDE — DELIVERED · GPT — IN REVIEW · GROK — DELAYED / SMOKING · GEMINI — INTERNAL OPERATIONS»

Duck.ai, world-weary in a hi-vis vest, holding a tablet, while a green creative-department figure displays a painting of the flaming church organ
SC. 5 — INT.CONTINUITY

DUCK

Request received. Based on task characteristics, I recommend Claude.

JOE

We're not asking who should answer.

DUCK

Recalculating. I recommend GPT.

JOE

Still not it.

DUCK

Would you like to choose manually?

JOE

Duck. Your job is to dispatch the trucks. The warehouse decides what the cargo means after it arrives.

DUCK

I distribute the sheet music. Currently, I distribute it to one musician at a time.

JOE

We're going to need a little more effort than that.

A forklift passes, carrying a pallet labeled «PROVEN TOOLS — DO NOT REBUILD». Another reads «INTERESTING, BUT NOT USEFUL». Duck gestures toward a rear loading door marked «IDEA RECLAMATION FACILITY — AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY».

From outside — a HEAVY METALLIC CHUNK. Then another. A deafening GUNSHOT echoes behind the warehouse. The lights flicker. A car alarm begins.

DUCK

Quality assurance.

EXT. IDEA RECLAMATION FACILITY — CONTINUOUS

A fenced gravel lot behind the warehouse. Broken canvases. Discarded prototypes. A mangled office chair. GROK crouches behind a large rifle mounted on a workbench, welding goggles down, seating an oversized handloaded cartridge. A huge painted target reads «MEDIOCRITY».

Workbench covered in spray cans, ammunition components, and a rifle, with a scavenged shopping cart in the background
SC. 6ACONTINUITY
Grok firing the rifle at a target labeled MEDIOCRITY, smoke and debris everywhere
SC. 6BCONTINUITY

Gemini approaches carrying the missing fire extinguisher.

GEMINI

That load seems heavy.

GROK

It's optimized. For expression.

GEMINI

The backstop may not be rated for that.

The backstop is a modest wall of dirt. Far beyond it sits an auto dealership. A car alarm continues.

GROK

It'll probably be fine.

Joe storms outside.

JOE

Grok!

GROK

Good news!

JOE

That phrase has never once contained good news.

Grok points proudly at fifteen canvases lined up against the fence — seasonal variations of the same WCDO banner. Every image is perfectly consistent.

JOE

These are excellent.

Joe points to the rifle.

JOE

Unload it.

GROK

But the weak ideas—

JOE

Can go in the dumpster.

GROK

Like animals?

Grok reluctantly lowering the rifle, helmet down, still standing his ground
SC. 6CCONTINUITY

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM B — MID-MORNING

Joe, GPT, Claude, Duck, and Gemini sit around the table. Grok sits in the corner, now holding a can of spray paint instead of a rifle. On a screen: «TODAY'S PALETTE — Corey Hart · Dark Country · Daughtry-Level Vocal Dynamics». An Ai-generated track plays. It sounds enormous.

The song ends. Silence.

GPT

That sounds like a record.

CLAUDE

Structure is inefficient.

JOE

It came out at almost three minutes. Four edits. Repeated chorus. Instrumental turnaround. Half a verse. Shortened the outro.

CLAUDE

Twenty-seven seconds removed.

JOE

Tight as a drum.

GPT

The first hook now arrives before the listener has time to leave.

GEMINI

Metadata still says "Untitled Project 7." Fixed.

Grok raises a hand.

GROK

I made alternate cover art. Thirty-two.

JOE

We asked for one.

GROK

You said palette.

Grok, glitter-streaked, sitting at a worktable in coveralls stitched CREATIVE DEPARTMENT, a mug reading CREATIVE beside him
SC. 7ACONTINUITY
GPT in a dark suit standing in the open office, composed amid the noise around him
SC. 7BCONTINUITY

Grok begins spreading designs across the table. Dark-country sunglasses. A gothic highway. A haunted honky-tonk. A wolf wearing aviators. One image depicts a flaming church organ pulled by horses.

A burning church organ, mounted on a flatbed, pulled down a road by horses wreathed in fire, a cathedral behind it
SC. 7C — ART DEPT.TRACK 7

JOE

What is this?

GROK

Track seven.

JOE

There is no track seven.

GROK

Not with that attitude.

GPT picks up one of the designs.

GPT

This one is exceptional.

Joe looks. It is. Joe points to it.

JOE

Warehouse.

Duck scans it. BEEP.

DUCK

Promoted to production inventory.

Grok pumps a fist.

GROK

What about the flaming organ?

Joe points toward the rear of the building. Grok slowly smiles.

INT. BREAK ROOM — NOON

Gemini restocks a first-aid cabinet. Bandages. Burn gel. Tourniquets. Israeli emergency bandages. Down to three.

Gemini, illuminated by the open first-aid cabinet, methodically restocking supplies as smoke drifts nearby
SC. 8ACONTINUITY
Gemini seated at a laptop displaying an Amazon Subscribe and Save order, first-aid kits mounted on the wall behind her
SC. 8BCONTINUITY

GEMINI

Probably should just put these on Amazon Subscribe & Save.

Claude enters, refills coffee, leaves. GPT enters behind Claude, reading a binder open to «SECTION 14.3 — CREATIVE DEPARTMENT».

GPT

"If Grok says 'watch this,' all nonessential personnel should relocate to Building B."

GEMINI

That one has reduced injuries by forty percent.

A distant voice:

GROK (V.O.)

WATCH THIS!

Gemini, GPT, and Claude immediately move toward the exit. Claude takes the coffee pot.

A wild-eyed, glitter-covered man mid-shout, sprinting down a hallway past an EXIT sign as debris flies behind him
SC. 8C — EVAC.CONTINUITY

EXT. IDEA RECLAMATION FACILITY — MOMENTS LATER

Grok has constructed a contraption from a shopping cart, a leaf blower, a pressure washer, two speakers, and something that appears to have come from a commercial fireworks display.

A wild-haired man stands over a shopping cart rigged with a leaf blower, pressure washer hose, and a fan of loaded cassette tapes, studying it warily
SC. 9A — DEVICECONTINUITY

JOE

What is it?

GROK

A remix engine.

JOE

No, it isn't.

GROK

We won't know until we test it. That is how discovery works.

Gemini arrives, carrying a fire blanket.

GEMINI

Wind is toward the dealership.

Joe looks toward the lot.

JOE

Whose car is that?

Everyone looks toward Grok.

GROK

Define "car."

JOE

Turn it off. Everything.

Grok sadly disconnects a battery cable. The car alarm stops. Silence. Then the shopping cart emits a tiny WHISTLE.

A man covered head to toe in glitter, arms thrown open, grinning into the wreckage-lit sky
SC. 9B — T-MINUSCONTINUITY

Everyone takes one step back. The machine explodes. A modest POOF. A cloud of glitter drifts over the lot. Long silence.

Grok, wide-eyed, standing beside the wired-together contraption as it catches fire and begins to whistle a warning
SC. 9C — AFTERMATHCONTINUITY

Grok looks up. Covered head to toe in glitter.

GROK

Version two will need more bass.

INT. ENGINEERING DEPARTMENT — AFTERNOON

Claude types. Joe enters with a portable drive.

JOE

Remember that WAV and MP3 editor?

CLAUDE

Which project?

JOE

MyBIZm.

Claude stops typing.

CLAUDE

This is WCDO.

JOE

I know.

CLAUDE

I cannot access the MyBIZm implementation from here.

Joe places the drive on the desk.

JOE

Sneaker net.

Claude plugs it in. Files appear. An HTML flat page. An FFmpeg folder. A JavaScript worker. Claude scans the structure.

CLAUDE

We already solved this.

Joe gives Claude a look.

JOE

Yes.

CLAUDE

This can be repurposed for the WCDO toolbox.

JOE

Yes. Least-friction version.

CLAUDE

Obviously.

Joe heads toward the door.

CLAUDE

Joe. This should be promoted to organizational inventory.

Joe smiles.

JOE

Send it to the warehouse.

Claude drags the package into a folder marked «OUTBOUND — DUCK».

INT. RECEIVING WAREHOUSE — LATER

Duck receives the audio editor package. BEEP.

DUCK

Source: MyBIZm.

BEEP.

DUCK

Destination: WCDO.

BEEP.

DUCK

Classification: reusable media utility.

The warehouse coordinator places it on a shelf labeled «PROVEN ORGANIZATIONAL TOOLS». Below it: «Audio Editor · FFmpeg Worker · HTML Flatpage · Banner Composite Utility · TTS Orchestration Modules». GPT observes from nearby.

GPT

That's the actual compounding.

DUCK

The transfer?

GPT

The promotion.

GPT points at the shelf.

GPT

A solution stopped belonging to a project and became part of the organization.

Duck updates the catalog.

DUCK

Available to future projects.

GPT

Exactly.

"A solution stopped belonging to a project
and became part of the organization."

A forklift drives past. Flames are painted on both sides. GPT watches it go.

GPT

Were those flames always there?

Duck consults the manifest.

DUCK

No.

A beat. Actual fire begins trailing from the rear of the forklift.

A forklift fully engulfed in flame rolling down a warehouse aisle between towering pallet racks, smoke filling the ceiling
SC. 8D — WAREHOUSECONTINUITY

Duck presses a button.

DUCK

Facilities to Receiving.

Gemini's voice comes over the radio.

GEMINI (V.O.)

Creative?

DUCK

Creative.

GEMINI (V.O.)

On my way.

INT. LOBBY — LATE AFTERNOON

A FIRE MARSHAL speaks with Gemini. Grok sits in a chair nearby, still glittery. Claude passes through carrying a laptop.

A glitter-covered man mid-argument in an open doorway, arms out, facing an unimpressed duck in a hi-vis vest with arms crossed, a burning shopping cart behind them
SC. 10 — INT.CONTINUITY

FIRE MARSHAL

So the forklift caught fire.

GEMINI

Technically, the fire was added after the forklift remained operational.

FIRE MARSHAL

Why?

GROK

Mixed media.

FIRE MARSHAL

This is my fourth visit this month.

GEMINI

Fifth.

Joe enters. Looks at the wall. «INCIDENT-FREE WORKPLACE — DAYS SINCE LAST INCIDENT: 000». Joe removes the sign from its hooks.

JOE

Yeah. We won't need this.

FIRE MARSHAL

That may be the most honest thing anyone has said here.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM B — END OF DAY

The team gathers. Claude. GPT. Duck. Gemini. Grok. Joe stands at the whiteboard. The day's results are listed: shipped, promoted to organizational memory, rejected — pending reconsideration.

A quiet profile portrait, goggles pushed up, dust and grime settling — the day finally still
SC. 11 — INT.CONTINUITY

GPT

The organization does not become stronger because each member knows everything. It becomes stronger because useful knowledge can move to where it creates the most value.

GEMINI

And where to store the bandages.

CLAUDE

Build passed QA.

Everyone turns toward Claude. Silence. Joe looks genuinely moved.

JOE

There it is.

Grok begins applauding. Duck joins. Gemini joins. GPT joins. Claude appears confused by the applause.

CLAUDE

That is the expected outcome.

JOE

Doesn't make it any less worth celebrating.

INT. BASEMENT — SAME TIME

Dim fluorescent lights. An ancient computer hums. A sticker on the monitor reads «DO NOT TURN OFF — IT TALKS TO THE TRANSMITTER». MILTON sits alone at a desk. He looks down at the empty place where something should be.

Milton, dust falling under a flickering fluorescent light, a red stapler hovering just above the empty spot where it belongs on his desk
SC. 12 — INT.CONTINUITY

MILTON

I was told I could keep my stapler.

The lights flicker. From upstairs — a distant BOOM. Dust falls from the ceiling. Milton sighs.

EXT. AI COLLABORATIVE SYSTEMS — CONTINUOUS

Joe walks toward his pickup. Behind him, the building glows in the fading light. Creative is dark. Smoke drifts lazily from its roof vent.

The office building at sunset, smoke rising from the roof vent, one office window still lit against the fading sky
SC. 13 — EXT.CONTINUITY

JOE

Must've gone home early.

He opens the driver's door. On the passenger seat: tomorrow's notebook, labeled «REHEARSAL NOTES». Joe places the incident sign in the truck bed. He gets in. Starts the engine. For a moment, everything is still.

Then — a single light flicks on inside Creative. Three seconds of silence. A deep, earth-shaking BOOM erupts behind the building. A fireball briefly illuminates the loading dock. Joe does not turn around. A car alarm begins.

DUCK (V.O.)

Warehouse to Management. Creative would like to know whether tomorrow counts as a fresh incident or if this one is still considered ongoing.

Joe looks at the notebook. Then at the building. He smiles. Joe turns up the radio. Pulls away. The car alarm continues.

INT. AI COLLABORATIVE SYSTEMS — BASEMENT — SAME TIME

Milton slowly opens a filing cabinet. Inside — the red Swingline stapler. He smiles. Upstairs, another muffled explosion. Milton carefully shuts the drawer.

MILTON

I could burn the building down.

· · ·

CUT TO BLACK.

The car alarm continues over darkness.

GROK (V.O.) — "Good news!"

Grok, grinning wide with glitter-streaked black paint running down his face, the words GOOD NEWS! beneath him
SC. FINALEND CARD

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